Thursday, June 16, 2011

Operation Wintergreen...

…is a stupid name for a blog. But my suggestion, “Arkady and the Arkadyettes”, was vetoed, so that’s what we went with in the end.

After experiencing a bout of shenanigans, Kal and Michenab came to Texas to meet Setoth and I. The four of us are now traveling together, and for the sake of convenience, we’re all moving over to a single blog. That blog is the aforementioned “Operation Wintergreen”, which can be found here.

And did I mention the kids? Yeah,we've got a near comatose eight year old girl and a twelve year old boy with anger issues. Baby sitting is not what I signed up for when I joined this.

To be honest, I’m starting to miss my lightning banner and storm wallpaper already.

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Saturday, June 4, 2011

Battle

I’m going to be running out of houses very quickly if this keeps up.

Peace and quiet are things which never last long, and as such one day I looked out the window to see that my house was surrounded by dense fog. Great way to start the day.

Though, it wasn’t just the fog. Outside waited Javert, as well as some buddies he’d brought along. All this searching, and he just shows up at my door. If only he’d called ahead of time, I could have put on something nice. He and the half dozen masked guys didn’t seem to be in any hurry; I expect if I’d stayed inside, they’d have continued to wait patiently in the driveway.

Course I wasn’t going to stay inside. It would be most impolite to keep Javert waiting out in the cold, so I had to go and greet him. Setoth came too, though he stayed rather far back. I bet he thought he looked so cool, leaning against that wall with an expression of disinterest. All he was missing was the leather jacket and the greased back hair. The paddle he was holding would have looked out of place in the picture, but I’m not one to deny a man his weapon of choice.

But we had to get things started, so I shouted a Mark Twain quote at him, which he responded to with a quote from Yevgeny Zamyatin’s “We”. Thus getting the formalities out of the way, Javert motioned for two of the masked proxies to move forward, which they did, at a rather clumsy charging pace.

The first was carrying a baseball bat, which he stupidly had raised above his head, as in preparation for a swing. This left the rest of him wide open, making it easy to stab him in the gut. He went down easy; these were no unstoppable corpses, just kids who had been misfortunate enough to be sent to fight me. Protip to any potential proxies out there: before you join with the tall guy, try to learn some of the basics of fighting. It may help you survive a few seconds longer when you have to fight someone like me.

My second opponent had a knife instead of a bat, but was just as inexperienced as the other. Sidestep one of his wild lunges, trip him, then slit his throat before he could stand back up. Just a minute had passed, and I’d already gone through a third of the cannon fodder.

Javert sent the next two proxies forward, because apparently he wanted to stick to the time old tradition of a villain sending their minions forward in groups small enough for the hero to easily dispatch them. The first tried to punch me; instead, he got his wrist broken. Then stabbed through the eye with a knife.

Our fourth proxy appeared to be the most intelligent one. Upon seeing what had happened to the three before him, he decided to go after the lesser appearing target, and charged at Setoth. Not that this proved to be any better a choice, as before the proxy could do anything, Setoth hit him in the throat with his paddle. At’a boy, Setoth. When in doubt, aim for the jugular. Several more quick blows to the head knocked the proxy down, and discouraged him from getting up again.

The remaining two redshirt minions were looking rather worried at this point, slowly backing up while casting fearful glances at Javert. Luckily for them, he did not order them forward. Instead he laughed, and stepped forward himself.

Javert: “Of course, this has to be settled between the two of us. Anything less would be anticlimactic.”

And fight we did. I still had the knife I’d been using on hand, so I tried stabbing with that; he grabbed my wrist and made me drop the knife. Javert went for a punch, which I blocked, followed by a punch of my own. This back and forth went on for some time, and I believe Javert was becoming rather surprised. Unlike our previous encounter, where Javert had rather shortly beaten me down, this time I was holding my own against him. But holding my own wasn’t going to be enough to beat Javert.

After some savagely fun beatings, the two of us broke away to regain our breath. As the two of us are prone to doing in these lulls, conversation began.

J: “You’ve been getting better.”

A: “Of course I am. I always eat my fruits and vegetables. And drink lots of milk.”

J: “Good. That will make it more satisfying when I give you the justice you deserve.”

A: “I’ve been meaning to tell you this Javert, but you’ve got a screwed up sense of justice.”

J: “Maybe from your perspective. But ridding the world of a monster like you is justice in its finest form.”

A: “Yeah, I’m really just not seeing it. What have I done to deserve this monstrous label?”

J: “Is that even a question which needs be asked anymore?”

A: “No, really. Since coming to Austin, what have I done? Killed a few people, but all them were trying to kill me. I can’t claim to have committed any deeds which are truly monstrous for months now. You though, Javert, you’ve gone all out with the moral depravity, haven’t you? Before it was just minor antagonism against me, but then you went and kidnapped someone. I have to congratulate you, for dropping yourself down to my level with such speed.”

J: “Don’t compare me to you/” Oho, was that a crack I was seeing in Javert’s guarded expression?

A: “Why ever not? Though, to be honest, considering what a good boy I’ve been lately, I’d almost say that you’ve become worse than me. Were a member of the Austin PD to happen to stroll by, I know which one of us he’d be arresting.” Brief pause, followed by me whispering, “Hint: It wouldn’t be me.”

J: That definitely got a reaction out of him; smile turned into a frown, and there was quite a lot of controlled rage behind his voice. “Everything I have done has all been done for His greater go-“

A: “Yeah, yeah, greater good, end justifies, the means, all that. Great defense; it allows you to do pretty much anything you want to and still claim that you’re the good guy. Especially if you claim that it’s all for God; I mean, who am I to claim what’s right and wrong if GOD HIMSELF is giving you orders?”

J: “Be quiet.”

That was when he charged at me and punched me in the face. Not very polite, all things considered.

A: “Aw, come on Javert. No need to be all aggressive just because I pointed out that your entire moral justification is based on the assumption that you’re already right. You should take the knowledge that you’ve committed the logical fallacy of begging the question with honor and dignity!”

That got me a punch to the gut. Such an action could not be left unresponded to, so there was another brief interlude of us beating the crap out of each other before we broke, and the conversation resumed.

A: “So, Javert, I’ve been doing some research.”

He didn’t answer. Far too busy glaring at me.

A: “Found out an interesting fact. Your family thinks you’ve disappeared. You didn’t explain anything to them at all, did you? Just up and vanished one day, leaving them behind without a word.”

J: And that was the major blow; I’d seen the cracks appearing, but this was what started to tear them apart “I couldn’t tell them where I was going. I needed to make sure they were safe.”

A: “Safe? From what, me? Whether or not you told them wouldn’t change my ability to drive back down and kill them. It’s less than an hour trip away. I could kill them in the morning and still have the whole day free. Nah, you not telling them wasn’t to protect them from me; it was to make sure they didn’t see what you were up to. I wonder what your little boy would have thought had he seen you laughing while you watched me slaughter your companions?”


Javert didn’t respond with words; just a wild shout and a blind charge. Very little thought or technique was put into his attack. Such a foolish mistake. If you’ve been paying attention, you may have noticed that I had yet to draw my sword during this fight. That was because I was saving it for a moment such as this. Before Javert could reach me, I swung the sword out of the sheath, into his stomach. As he doubled over from the blow, I swung the sheath, hitting him in the head. Javert fell to his knees, and once more I struck him in the head, knocking him to the ground. He tried frantically crawling back onto his feet, eyes glaring at me with all the hate in the world. Couldn’t let him do that, oh no, so I provided several more blows to the head, neck, and back. He kept screaming, “I’LL KILL YOU!” and other similar variations, but there was little chance of him carrying out these threats. His cool, collected manner was gone, replaced by blind, talentless anger. A pity, really; in seconds, the fight had gone from pure entertainment to an easy victory.

Thinking that it was an easy victory brought about the inevitable turn for the worse, and a few moments later I was pondering many mysteries, such as why the fog was suddenly tinted orange, or why the temperature had risen, or why I was smelling something burning, and oh good god was that my house on fire?

Slender Man had manifested within the fog, and with him came fire, which gutted my old home. Setoth, being a sensible person, immediately ran for the car. I, not being a sensible person, stayed put. Round 2, Mr. Man, and this time I didn’t need to worry about protecting some stupid girl….

Tentacles tore out of Slender Man’s back and came at me. No ominous build up, this was Slendy going straight for the kill. And I wouldn’t have wanted it any other way.

I charged forward, into the oncoming attack. The tentacles looked like a black mass, but there were gaps between them, just enough to move through. It would be impossible to dodge everything, but I could minimize the damage. I twisted and jumped through them, trying to predict the path of the constantly weaving lines. I took several hits, more than I could count; scratches along my entire body, long gashes down my legs, the tip of my left ear cut off…. My shirt was left a ruin, which made me sad. I liked that shirt. The important fact was that I was managing to keep my vital organs intact, or intact enough for me to keep pushing forward. Then, I could see the end. Slendy’s tie, a wonderful target to be aimed for. I lunged forward with my sword, aiming to strike down this creature….

But then my sword was gone. One moment there, next moment, my hand was empty. Forward momentum propelled me forward, weaponless, towards Slender Man. More tentacles came out of his chest, and wrapped themselves around my arm. The grip was stronger than anything I’ve felt before, and they slowly started to pull me inwards. I tried swinging my other arm to punch the thing, but more tentacles came out and gripped that fist as well. With both my hands trapped, I was being slowly pulled in towards Slender Man.

Whatever nastiness would have ensued is something I can only speculate on, as the sound of several gunshots created a bit of a shocked silence. I took a moment to look away from Slendy, and saw Javert, holding his gun, and firing it, not at me, but at Slender Man, while shouting, “No! He’s mine! I will kill him! Only me!”

Slender Man did not seem to take this rebellious spirit well. He released his grip on me (and by that I mean he threw me into a tree with what I consider to be an excessive amount of force), and began to slowly walk towards Javert. Javert continued to fire at Slender Man, madly screaming about how he was the only person allowed to kill me. One of the still standing proxies ran over and tried to restrain Javert, only to be shot in the face as a result. Even after ineffectually firing the rest of the clip into Slender Man, Javert continued to pull the trigger, over and over, as though it had become an automatic motion. Only once Slendy was a meter away did Javert throw aside the gun and charge. His charge was less successful than mine had been, and he was enveloped in tentacles within seconds. As the tentacles wrapped around Javert, he began to scream in pain. But even between the cries, he still was trying to shout his intent to kill me.

The sound of a car horn turned me away from the spectacle of Javert and Slendy, reminding me that Setoth was still inside my car. He shouted, “I know you’re worried about your boyfriend, but get in the car now!” Such a polite fellow. I was torn, for part of me did still wish to charge back into the fray, but Javert fighting Slender Man was such a delicious irony that I couldn’t bring myself to interfere. I got into the car, and Setoth drove, taking us away from the fire and fog.

Right before we left, I threw one of my knives out the window at the last standing proxy. Missed him (you try hitting a target while you’re in a moving car), but damn, did I make him jump. I wish I could have seen his expression under that mask.

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Saturday, May 28, 2011

What is it With Buildings and Fire?

It shouldn’t be this hard to find one person, even in a large city like this. It’s not as though Javert exactly blends in. A black trench coat, over a black police uniform, in the middle of Central Texas summer? Perhaps the reason I haven’t been able to find him is because he collapsed from heat exhaustion while trying to look cool in his heavy clothes. But maybe I’m giving the man too much credit for his hide and seek skills. He does have supernatural assistance.

Now, there was something else I was supposed to mention here that didn’t have to do with Javert…. Something important…. Hm…. What could it be….

Oh, yeah, Setoth’s apartment burned down.

Happened yesterday. I’d just been wandering back from another fruitless day trying to find Javert, when I saw the fire. It was consuming the building at a pretty rapid pace; it was only chance that Setoth had been outside at the time, and thus wasn’t caught in the blaze. We left before the fire department arrived, as neither of us really wanted to try and explain our situation to them.

So, now we’re living in the empty tomb that is my parent’s house. And yes, tomb is a very appropriate word. There isn’t a sign that anyone has been inside it since I left. Dust covers everything, half the lights don’t work, and there’s constantly this unnatural echo. When I questioned the neighbors, none of them remembered anyone living inside the house. They didn’t even recognize me, though I’d lived there most of my life (but then again, that may be because the last time any of them saw me, I didn’t have facial scarring and still had the time to shave). It’s all just a big, creepy, unsettling situation.

Really not sure I like staying here. It does have certain advantages: plenty of food still in the pantry, air conditioning, I get to sleep on a real bed instead of just a mattress, and I raided the kitchen knives for weapons. But even so, this place has too many connections to the old me. Back when I was weak, and tried to hide my fear with empty boasts. But if I have to put up with those memories, then I will. No! I won’t just put up with them! I will use the memories of my old self as proof of how far I have come since that day! And they shall serve as the motivation for me to become EVEN STRONGER!

Far too motivated to keep typing now. Going to go and prepare for Javert’s inevitable defeat at my hands.

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Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Big Damn Heroes

If you read Setoth’s blog, you may have heard about the girl he’s been with lately, whom he’s taken to calling “Babs” for the sake of her anominity.] I didn’t bother to mention it here, as I don’t believe Setoth’s love life has anything to do with me, beyond forcing me to put up with an unbearably cheery Setoth.

But, long story short, she got kidnapped by Javert. Setoth considered this a big deal for some reason, and demanded we find and rescue her. Luckily for our search efforts, Javert chose to be generous, and the next day a note containing a date, time, address, and Javert’s signature was left on our door.

I scouted out the place several hours before the meeting time. It was a big, fancy, gated North Austin lake house. Javert must be really moving up in the world if he can get a place like that on a policeman’s salary.

Of course it was obvious the whole thing was a trap. That knowledge never detracted from our willingness to complete the task, but it did make our planning much more cautious.

It was decided early on that Setoth, not me, would be the one to confront Javert, because, in Setoth’s words, “We’re trying to save someone, not turn the house into a giant crater.” While Setoth would handle talking to Javert, I would go in, grab the girl, then get out. Now that I actually have a cell phone (and by have a cell phone, I mean I took Babs’s phone from her place after we learned she’d been kidnapped), I could call Setoth when I was done, and we’d both get out of there.

My first thought was to just charge the gate, fight my way past anyone I met, find Babs, and declare it all a success. But I knew Javert would be expecting something like that, so instead I’d need to sneak in over the gate in the back. But Javert would know that I knew that I couldn’t run in, so he’d have preparations there as well. But since I knew that he knew that I knew….

It all was getting very confusing. As such, when the time did come, after dropping Setoth off and waiting long enough for him to focus Javert’s attention, I just smashed through the gate with my car, and then drove it through these big windows someone had installed in the place in order to make it look all modern and stylish. Having created my dramatic entrance, I started running through the house, searching the rooms.

When I had envisioned this part of the plan, I’d been expecting it to involve me fighting my way through hordes of proxies in fierce room to room combat. Instead, there was no one else inside to greet me. Very unnerving, and I began to wonder if, between zerosage and I, we’d somehow managed to kill every proxy in Central Texas apart from Javert. Given the body count we’ve been having, that actually wouldn’t be too surprising.

I found Babs in a second story bedroom. Once more, my expectations of what I would encounter failed to match the reality. I had been envisioning her locked away in a dark, filthy room, something akin to a medieval dungeon. Instead she was lying on an expansive bed in a very nice looking bedroom, watching a television screen with mild disinterest. Though her expression of surprise when I charged inside the room was priceless, I’ll say. The entire exchange when a little like this:

Arkady: “I’m Evan Everyman, and I’m here to rescue you.”

Babs: “What?”

Arkady: “Oh, forget it. Get up, we’re leaving.”

Why does no one ever laugh at my attempts to make EverymanHYBRID jokes?

Surprise meant she didn’t argue much when I dragged her back to my car and began to drive away. I’d only made it a few hundred feet from the house when I got a call from Setoth’s phone.



Arkady: “Setoth, I’ve rescued Babs. Where should I meet you to pick you up-“

Javert: “Arkady! It’s been too long.”
Well, fuck.

A: “What have you done with Setoth?”

J: “He’s perfectly fine. No need for you to worry. Though I must say, I am surprised at you. I would have never expected you to take the chivalrous route and gone for the girl when you could have fought me instead. Perhaps this Setoth is being a good influence on you.” Right. I totally saved Babs because of Setoth’s good influence. And not because he threatened bodily harm towards me if we didn’t try to save her.

A: “Yeah, well, I’m just such a nice guy. Can’t help but rescue a damsel in distress and shit.”

J: “Rescue? On the contrary, I was the one who rescued her; you are returning her to captivity.”
Say what.

A: “Is this going to be one of those times when you give some kind of bullshit explanation for why you’re so morally superior to us, because I’m honestly starting to get really tired of things like that.”

J: “Look at her life before this. A meaningless existence defined only by excess, filling her nights with drugs and mindless hedonism. She was falling into the gutter of society. Had you actually bothered to speak to her during her time with Setoth, you would have seen it clearly. I’m pulling her out of the darkness she has been engulfed in, back into the light.”

A: “By forcing her to be some kind of mindless drone?”

J: “Force? No, never something like that, Arkady. If she had desired to become one of His disciples later on, that would be acceptable. All I was doing was taking her away from the influences which had harmed her, and giving her a new chance at life.”

A: “Right, you were just trying to help her, which is why you used her as bait for us.”

He didn’t answer that one. I think I might have struck a nerve.

A: “So what was your plan, anyways? It can’t have been a very good one. I mean, I just drove in and grabbed her. I’m thinking you’ve forgotten how to set up ambushes, Javert.”



Instead of an answer, I heard static from the phone. Then the car radio began blaring random noises, the headlights flashed on and off, and hey, look at that, there’s a tall man in a suit right in the middle of the road. I swerved to the side and stopped the car. Babs was screaming the whole time, but by then, I didn’t care.

The thing was walking at an ominous pace towards the car. Very kind of him, to be moving slow enough to give me time to get out of the car and draw my sword. Every step he took, more tentacles came out of his body, which twisted around him with surprising ferocity.

This was it; a chance I’d been looking for. Just Slendy and I, in a no holds fight to the death. Sure, the last time I tried to fight him I got knocked into a lake, but this time it would be different. All the fighting I’ve gone through since then has only made me better; I’m stronger, faster, and more skilled than I have ever been. I figured I might be able to get in one or two hits on Slendy before he impaled me.

As I was preparing to fight, a voice came through the static of my phone. Setoth, shouting loudly to confirm if I was alive.

Arkady: “Hey, Setoth. Yeah, I’m here.”

Setoth: I could barely hear him over the static “Where…. You?”

A: “Not far from the house. But we seem to have run into some Slender trouble.”

S: “Shit…. Is [Babs] (Setoth is insisting that I alter the transcript to keep the girl anonymous. Sure, fine, I’ll do that.) alright?”

A: “Oh, she’s fine right now. I expect Slendy will eat her after he’s finished killing me.”

S: “….Get…. There!”

A: “Leave? And miss all this fun? Not a chance!”

I put the phone down, while Setoth shouted at me to run for it. With every second that Slender Man came closer, the anticipation rose higher. One last rush of adrenaline, a glorious last stand….

Setoth: “… Die now how…. Kill Javert?”

That was a legitimate point. Was I going to let Javert walk away free just because I wanted my beautiful death? Was I going to die in a trap that he had set?

Like hell I was. I’ll decide when I die, not Javert. Much as it pained me to do so, I would need to leave my epic battle with the Slender Man for another time. I pulled the phone back up and told Setoth to expect me in a few minutes. He did have one last comment to me before I ran for it:

Setoth: “Don’t you dare…. Think of using [Babs] as bait so you can escape!”

Oh, Setoth. You know me too well. That was exactly what I’d been planning. But since apparently killing her is off limits, I had to drag her away. Although soon I was practically carrying her so she could keep up (Oh, you silly average people and your inability to run sub-five minute mile pace for long periods of time). Slendy chose not to follow us. Which was kind of him, as no amount of running can keep you ahead of teleportation.

Since then, we’ve made it back to Setoth. Who was in desperate need of first aid at the time due to stabbing his own hand with a knife. He still hasn't explained to me what that was all about. Guess I'll need to wait for him to make the blog post about it, same as you lot. He had a good ol’ heart to heart talk with Babs, explaining a lot of what was going on to her. Somewhere along the line he decided that it wasn’t safe for her to stay with us crazies, so she’s going to be on the run soon. Her family owns a vacation home in Georgia, which is pretty close to where the Father of Light guys are right now. It sounds like they might be meeting up there, so Setoth’s happy that she’ll be staying with people we know.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to go find something to punch, because if I have to put up with hearing the sickeningly sweet goodbyes those two are saying for much longer, I’m going to retch.

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Thursday, April 28, 2011

50/50

So according to the Reintegration Tablet I've got just over a 50% chance of surviving Slender Man.

I think I like that percentage. Flip a coin, heads I win, tails I lose. It creates the necessary tension: will he win? Or will he lose? Could go either way.

The analysis of my intelligence left me a bit sad, though. Come on, AI Guy. I can quote Shakespeare from memory, and you rank me just slightly above Morningstar? I'm insulted. What do you want me to do, invent sustainable cold fusion or something?

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Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Zerosage

We never have much of a break in the excitement round these parts.

I’ve been really enjoying not being trapped in some kind of weird alternate dimension thing. It’s a nice feeling, living in a reality not under an eldritch being’s complete control, not constantly seeing the setting change around you, and just being able to go outside and take a walk without anything too freaky happening.

It was on one of these walks when the events which I shall tell of occurred. I was on my way back to Setoth’s apartment, walking along a tree line on the edge of St. Edwards campus. It was a quite night out, all nice and calm.

And so I really wasn’t expecting someone to leap out of the trees and try to stab me. My attacker seemed to come out of nowhere; I didn’t have time to dodge, and only prevented myself from being killed by moving my forearm in the way of the blade. I’d rather get stabbed in the arm than have my neck cut open (although, to be honest, if I had the chance neither would happen to me). My attacker was using a sword with phosphorous paint over it, a hoodie (also with phosphorous paint, creating an operator symbol pattern), and a monster mask. He was also shouting something about how I was a monster he would destroy, or something. But when I saw that mask, it looked familiar. Not like anything I’d seen in real life, but like something from a website…. Maybe a blog post somewhere…..

That’s right, ladies and gents, everyone’s favorite ex-Sage, zerosage had decided to pay me a visit! I was so flattered. Me, being put on his hit list. The only sadness I felt then was from the knowledge that I would have to kill him, and thus be unable to read any more of his murderous adventures.

Upon throwing zerosage off me, I expressed my joy at seeing him, although he didn’t appear to share the same reaction. He said some cruel things to me, implying that Slendy was my master WHICH HE IS MOST CERTAINLY NOT. Zerosage continued to say these cruel things, such as “You fed him...you willfully committed murder in his name….” as he got back up and ran at me. His swings with the sword were sloppy, lacking any real training; as such I easily was able to avoid them. I tried to throw in some witty retorts, but as a result of spending more attention on being humorous than on my surroundings, which caused me to trip on some uneven ground. Zerosage did not put this opportunity to waste, and jumped on me. In the ensuing brawl, I attempted to bash in his nose with the hilt of my sword, but the mask made this difficult. My blows caused the mask to shift slightly, giving me a look at his eyes. He was crying.

What are you supposed to do when the person trying to kill you is crying? It was such an odd, out of place sight, that for a few seconds I was in shock. Zerosage trying to press his sword down on my throat snapped me out of that. He kept repeating, “Forgive me.” Unfortunately for him, I am not the most forgiving of people, so instead I bit his wrist. That gave me the chance to throw him off, and get back onto my feet. While zerosage was still on the ground, I swung my sword down at him, striking him in the head. Even without an edge, that blow should have been enough to end the fight, but zerosage grabbed my injured arm and said, “I cannot stop, no, damn you….” Then he started to pull on the arm, causing a significant amount of pain. Both of us attempted to punch the other in the face, which resulted in us once more on the ground in a brutal melee. Somehow zerosage was able to get his hands around my throat, and started strangling me. I tried to gouge out his eyes, but again the mask made if difficult. I was starting to black out when I finally made him let go. Then I kicked him in the ribs, knocking him on his back. He looked too broken to get up again, so I limped over to retrieve my sword (which had been knocked away at some point in the chaos), and walk back over to zerosage.

Arkady: “This has been fun and all zerosage, but I think now's a good stopping point.”

Zerosage: “And when will...he? Stop?”

Arkady: “Good question. I'll ask him that next time I see him.”

Once more, I swung at his head, and connected with a crack. Only this time, he grabbed onto my sword. Zerosage shouted at me, “You…. Damn fool…. You...will not ask him...anything ever again!” And then he pulled out a taser and shot me in the arm with it.

And that was how I ended up lying on the ground in a twitching mess, while zerosage drew a serrated knife and stood over my defenseless body. His mask had almost completely fallen off, letting me see the tears running down his face, mixing with the blood from his wounds. He kept saying “Forgive me, oh god forgive me” over and over and over and over. Then he started cutting my forearm with that knife. They weren’t violent cuts intended to wound; instead they were almost surgical, carving around the bone. Although at the time, I was more focused on him cutting apart my arm than anything else, even if I couldn’t do anything about it.

Before he finished cutting, a shriek echoed around us. I saw a sudden blur of motion barreling towards zerosage. A human figure tackled zerosage, knocking him off me. It was a very distinct figure, one which I had seen several times before. Porfiry. Or, at least what was left of him.

Zerosage and the moving corpse’s fight quickly took them out of sight. I was still on the ground, unable to move, and know bleeding pretty badly from my arm. But then I heard footsteps behind me. From my position on the ground, I could just barely see the person in my peripherals. All I made out was a pair of black boots, the bottom half of a black police uniform, and a long black coat. Lots of black there.

As soon as he spoke, I instantly recognized the voice. Not like I could ever forget it.

“Porfiry’s last stand.” Javert said. “Even with His power supporting the body, Porfiry won’t be able to survive this fight. It’s such a sad thing, giving his life to save someone such as you. Someone who has completely rejected His offering of salvation. Honestly, I think He wouldn’t have minded had you died here. After your refusal of His will, there has no longer been the compulsion for us to keep you alive for the sake of bringing you into the fold. However….”

He was silent for a while, during which time I continued to be bleeding and unable to move.

“I still have yet to see you receive the justice which you deserve. I cannot have you die until I have made you suffer at my hands, in punishment for your sins.”

Then he just walked off. After I regained control of my muscles, I crawled/limped back to Setoth’s apartment, where I was able to stop the bleeding. Even so, it’s going to be hard to do anything with my left arm for a while.

On the morning news, the police found a body floating in Town Lake. They couldn’t identify it, but unless someone else is running around using phosphorous paint on their cutting tools, it was likely Porfiry’s. The remains looked like they had been run through a meat grinder; not even the bones were left unbroken. Javert was right about one thing. This time, I don’t think Porfiry is coming back.

But in spite of him killing Porfiry before I could, and very badly hurting my arm, I had fun with this whole thing. We should do it again sometimes.

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Saturday, April 16, 2011

Why so Silent, Good Messieurs?

Did you think that I had left you for good?

Has it really only been two weeks? It feels so much longer. How long, I cannot say. My sense of time when I was in that place was off.

So where did I leave off? Last you heard from me, it seems I was angrily shouting at the heavens. So what did I do next? I started trying to break things; a perfectly rational response, in my opinion.
What’s this? You want me to relive some point in my childhood, Slendy? But what will you do if I decide not to play along with the event as it happened, and instead start a fire and burn the building down?
This time I’m back outside Javert’s house, on the night I made his family hostages? But what if this time, I politely knock at their door, help them cook dinner and have a nice chat before excusing myself and going home?
Oh, so you’re placing me in that desperate moment where I escaped my apartment, and was driving frantically down the interstate to get as much distance as I could from the police? How about I turn the car around, and then ram Javert’s patrol car head on?
Next you’re making me go through that time I killed Jason, except from his perspective? But what if when hallucination me tries to push me off, I grab his arm, break his fingers, throw him onto the ground, stomp on his head repeatedly, and then toss the limp body over?


WHAT THEN, SLENDY?

I barely remember the specifics of it all. I don’t know if there was supposed to be a purpose or a message behind all the visions, but if there was, I ignored it. Possibly something about morality. Or what a bad, bad man I am. In the end, in spite of all these silly attempts to break my mind, my entire response could be summed up as “Screw this, I’m doing whatever I want”. Was I missing the entire point of this dream sequence-esque deal? Certainly. But there’s just something so satisfying about breaking the rules. Where I was expected to kill, I talked. Where I was expected to watch, I intervened. Where I was expected to run, I fought. Soon the experience ceased to be painful, and changed into a pleasure. It was exhilarating.

But Slendy did not seem to take kindly to me throwing aside the rules. The next few experiences were painful, to put it in the most understated tones. And they went on for a long time. A very long time.

Then everything ended abruptly, though it took my mind a while to understand that the pain had stopped. The world around me was completely black, as though covered in a complete darkness. Soon, a small light appeared. The light grew larger, as though coming closer, and its brightness intensified, until soon I was unable to look directly at it. Thoughts came unbidden to my mind as the light grew closer: that the light represented salvation, forgiveness, but most importantly, an end to the pain. Come into the light, accept it, and you will be freed from all anxiety and suffering. Leave this hell, and be at peace.

I didn’t have to think long.

With a smile, I leapt backwards, away from the light, further into the darkness.

I fell through the blackness for years without end. Or something poetic sounding like that. For a moment I closed my eyes, and then felt a thump as I touched the ground. When I opened them, I was lying on my mattress in Setoth’s apartment. Setoth was there as well, although his reaction to my sudden appearance was a bit disappointing. More of an “Oh, you’re back” than anything else. But I guess that sums it up best. Oh, well, it looks like I’m back.

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Thursday, April 7, 2011

Stop screwing with me, Slendy. Seriously. STOP. If you keep this up, I will be left with no choice but to take out my frustration on my laptop’s keyboard! Look! I’m already doing it! I’M RANTING! AND THESE RANTS WILL BE POSTED ONLINE! THAT’LL SHOW YOU FOR FUCKING WITH ME, SLENDY!

We could start with letting me in on how long I’ve been staying here! Days? Months? Years? It would help if my laptop could just decide what date it is and stick with it for more than five seconds!

And why’d we have to leave the grey city? I was getting used to that grey city! Now it’s all Weird Hallucination, Flashback, Creepy Forest, Flashback, Blackness, Weird Hallucination. HOW MANY FUCKING TIMES ARE YOU GOING TO HAVE ME KILL JASON? ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE ME FEEL GUILTY OR SOMETHING, SLENDY? WE’VE BEEN OVER THIS ALREADY! THIS ISN’T GUILT INDUCING, IT’S JUST ANNOYING! AND IT DOESN’T HELP THAT YOU HAVE JAVERT’S VOICE RANTING IN THE BACKGROUND ABOUT WHAT A MONSTER I AM EVERY TIME I HAVE TO KILL HIM!

Seriously, what is all of this? Childhood memories? Annoyingly symbolic hallucinations? Are you trying to break me? Slendy, Slendy…. Don’t you realize who the hell you’re dealing with?

I AM

AKADY!

IVANOVICH!

SVIDRIGAILOV!

And I will NOT BE BEATEN BY SUCH PATHETIC TRICKS. You think this can stop me? Over and over, you’ve increased pressure on me, pushing me closer to the edge, until at last the point where I should snap. But at each climax, you have FAILED to defeat me; every time, I emerged STRONGER than I was before. DO YOU SERIOUSLY THINK THIS TIME WILL BE ANY DIFFERENT? THAT JUST BECAUSE YOU HAVE ME TRAPPED HERE, YOU HAVE ME AT YOUR MERCY? I WILL TEAR DOWN THIS ENTIRE WORLD IF I HAVE TO!

Come on Slendy, enough of this play. If you aren’t going to let me out, then come out here and face me. FIGHT ME LIKE A FUCKING MAN. I AM SICK AND TIRED OF THIS GAME. I WILL RIP YOUR TENTACLES OFF WITH MY BARE HANDS IF I HAVE TO, AND THEN I WILL BEAT YOU WITH THOSE TENTACLES UNTIL ALL THAT IS LEFT OF YOU IS A BLACK SMEAR ON THE GROUND.

NO MATTER WHAT VISIONS YOU PUT ME THROUGH, NO MATTER HOW MANY OF YOUR STUPID PUPPETS YOU THROW AT ME, NO MATTER HOW MUCH PAIN YOU MAKE ME EXPERIENCE, I WILL FIGHT YOU UNTIL I HAVE WON. I WILL BE THE LAST ONE STANDING, THE ONLY VICTOR, THE CONQUEROR OF ALL.

EVERYTHING WHICH STANDS IN MY WAY SHALL BE BURNT TO ASHES!

YOU THINK YOURSELF TO BE A GOD? DON’T MAKE ME LAUGH.


IF YOU’RE A GOD, THEN I’M FUCKING RAGNARÖK.
AND IT’S ABOUT TIME FOR THE GÖTTERDÄMMERUNG.

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Monday, April 4, 2011

Wherever Here Is

Fuck.

I’ve been using that word a lot lately. I never used to. I tended to avoid obscenities, feeling they were much too crass and uncultured. But now it seems to be the only thing which adequately describes my feelings.

Kal and Michenab screwed up whatever protection stuff Setoth had given them, and Slendy was starting to break through. So Setoth and I had to bail them out with Setoth magick.
Setoth again came up with the plan. What it boiled down to was, we were going to try to forcibly drag Slendy all around Austin. You see, we already knew that Setoth’s summoning ritual had some kind of effect on him; that was how Setoth got into this whole mess to begin with. So what Setoth wanted to do was to set up recordings of the ritual all over the city. They would activate and pull Slendy to that spot. His presence would cause the electronics in the recording to break, but by the time that would happen, the next recording would activate, and he would be pulled to someplace completely different. During that time, Kal and Michenab were to grab the girl and make a run for it.

The plan went amazingly smoothly. We set up each of the recordings sights and turned on all the devices without any interference. No proxies, no Slendy, nothing. Given how rare success is in our field of business, we naturally assumed that this meant something unspeakably horrible was happening on the Father of Light side. The two of us rushed back to Setoth’s apartment, where he called Kal. Kal reported that everything was fine; the instant we’d started the recordings, Slender Man had vanished. We suspected it might have been a trap, so Kal remained in contact with us through the escape. The atmosphere was tense as he told us that he’d grabbed the girl, and Michenab had gotten his car. Then we got word that they were driving away from the apartment, and still hadn’t seen any sign of Slendy. It sounded like victory; the summoning gambit had worked, allowing Kal and Michenab to escape.

Then Slender Man appeared in front of us. I had only a brief moment then, not long enough to act, barely long enough to think. All I felt was incredible rage emanating from the creature, directed at me. Then I blacked out.

When I woke up, I was here. Wherever here is.

It looks like Austin…. Kinda. The basic geography has remained the same; streets and buildings are where they should be. If you can call them the same streets and buildings. Last I checked, the buildings of Austin were not gigantic monoliths that stretched above the clouds. Seemed like a new feature.

I haven’t seen anyone since appearing here, not even Setoth. Everything is gray and quiet. I can shout, but there’s no echo; just my voice falling dead in the air. Even the sound of my footsteps is muffled. I don’t know where the light is coming from; there’s no sun in the sky. No shadows anywhere, not from the buildings, not from myself. Only a gray light, without any source or direction.

I tried entering one of the buildings, but the door was locked. So I tried breaking it down, but was thwarted by its unnatural resilience. All other doors proved similarly difficult to penetrate, and even the glass windows appeared invulnerable. So it would appear that I’m stuck here on these empty streets.

This, though, is par for course when dealing with Slendy. What confuses me is the WiFi. I’m still able to connect to the internet; hell, the connection here is better than the one at Setoth’s place. Now, excuse me for sounding paranoid, but I doubt Slendy would set up a router inside this place just for me. Which means that he’s not only fine with me connecting, but he wants me to be able to access the internet.

Beyond appearing in this place, there’s little else for me to talk about. Everything I’ve seen in here is static and boring. I’m going to be looking for a way out, as I would prefer not to spend the rest of my life in boring town.

There had better be a way out of here. I will be filled with an excessive amount of anger if there isn’t.

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Saturday, April 2, 2011

Recap

A lot of stuff happened this week. Might be best if we give it a quick look over, to make sure everything’s in order.


-First, Kal saw a kid being kidnapped by Slendy right in front of him. This got Kal out of his whining, “Wah, wah, I’m being followed by a faceless embodiment of pure evil!” and made him want to join in the fight for GLORY.

-Kal got into contact with Setoth, asking for advice. Setoth came up with the theory that Slender Man might be related to the Astral Plane, and sent Kal in there. Kal didn’t find anything there, but did see some suspicious black forests of horror, although he could not enter those.

-Setoth then came up with a new theory, that Slendy was hiding out in some kinda weird place called “Oneiros”, which he claims is the Astral Plane’s reflection of the human subconscious and dream world. Kal and Setoth made a plan to go into Oneiros and find the boy whom Kal had seen taken.

-Now for the important part (the part where I’m included). While Setoth was in Oneiros, his body was vulnerable. So I had to play defense, and fight off anyone who came after us. Which they did. Thus I smote Slender Man’s entire legion of proxies singlehandedly.

-After my glorious battle, Setoth found himself forced back into the physical world, leaving Kal all by his lonesome in Oneiros.

-Then comes the twist, for while we were waiting for word from Kal, the next post on Father of Light was from Michenab (You know, Kal’s roommate. The one who thus far had absolutely no connection to Slendy whatsoever). You see, Michenab had come home to find an unconscious Kal next to a girl who had been kidnapped recently. Conclusions were jumped to, and Michenab grabbed the girl and ran out.

-Finally, we got word from Kal, detailing the adventure he had in Slenderworld. He tried to get in contact with Michenab, and convince him that his being found with a missing child was totally the fault of a supernatural creature and not him.

-Somehow, Kal talked Michenab into meeting. No clue how he pulled that off. Anyways, when Michenab went off to speak with Kal, he met a certain special someone. You see, it seems that Slendy doesn’t like it when people play with his food. Poor Kal, now he’s dragged his roommate into this as well.

-Michenab took the girl back to Kal’s place. Setoth got into contact with them, and recommended some weird ritual thing he claims would protect them for a while, which they did.

Which brings us to present day. Setoth’s been staying in contact with Kal; so far they haven’t seen Slendy, which Setoth takes as proof that the ritual is working, but meh, I’m skeptical. The last two times Setoth tried setting up magkical protection it didn’t work.

Haven’t seen Javert or Porfiry since that night; if I’m lucky, Porfiry’s dead. But I’ve learned to not leap to such conclusions where Porfiry is concerned. Going over the damage they did to me…. Well, I’m having to learn first aid pretty fast. As I mentioned before, my left shoulder was dislocated, and had to be popped back into place. That was also the shoulder which Porfiry bit, which I had to stitch up myself (stitching a recently dislocated shoulder is among the more painful things I’ve had to do in recent history). My nose had also been broken, and also had to be moved back into place. Plus I’ve got four scars going right across my face, where Porfiry clawed me. Deep, red scars; this wasn’t just a few scratches. The man would have clawed me to the bones if I’d given him the chance. It gave me some interesting looks at the store when I bought Setoth two bottles of absinthe (One to replace the bottle I’d used as a Molotov, and the other to replace the bottle I’d used to sterilize stuff while I had been fixing myself. Usually I’d ignore his complaints about me using his things, but I figured he’d earned it this time.)

So that’s how I spent my week. Now we wait to see how Slendy responds….

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Friday, April 1, 2011

Happy News

Javert showed up at my door today.

At first I was prepared to fight, but then he dropped down to one knee, and pulled out a ring. It was there that he confessed his eternal love for me, and asked for my hand in marriage.
Of course I said yes.

We're going to be getting married in a small abandoned shed in the middle of the woods, with Slender Man presiding (little known fact, but Slender Man is an ordained priest). It's just going to be a small ceremony, with only close friends and family attending. Setoth has already agreed to be a flower girl.

For the honeymoon, we're thinking of Libya, or some other war torn nation where the two of us can spend hours just gazing into each others eyes as we slaughter thousands.

Sure, there's still disagreements about the nature of his job, but I'm positive true love will find a way. I just wish this happiness that I'm feeling could last forever!

Oh, Javert's calling! I'll be back soon.


And one last thing.

Happy April first.

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Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Showdown

I left off with those four proxies getting out of the cars. One of them was Javert; I didn’t recognize the other three. New faces; not anyone who had been part of Javert’s police force. Javert was in his black police uniform, but the others were dressed in regular street clothes. Let’s call these three Shaggy, Velma, and Scooby, because they reminded me of old cartoon characters. Okay, Scooby wasn’t a dog, but he was hairy enough that he could be called one. Javert led them to the front entrance, where Setoth had drawn his sigils in chalk. It was hard to tell from as high up as I was, but I’m pretty sure Javert told some kind of joke at the symbols expense before just stepping over it. I expected something to happen, something dramatic. But there was nothing. No bright flash of light, or ominous thunder, or anything. He stepped over the thing, like it was just lines of chalk.

Once they were inside…. Well, that was when the fun would begin. I’d spent hours memorizing the place, and knew all the spots where I could observe them secretly, so I could track their progress.

The four drew guns and split up (I could imagine Javert saying, “Alright gang, let’s split up!” followed by one of the proxies, probably Shaggy, saying something similar to “Zoinks!”). Javert, Velma and Scooby went straight for the stairs to the second floor, while Shaggy looked around the first.

Shaggy was the first to find one of my traps. A rope had been stretched across a doorframe, roughly at the level of the ankles. Shaggy saw it just before he tripped on the rope. Oh, that grin which appeared on his face; so full of pride at himself for seeing such an obvious trap, and amusement at the cartoonish nature of it. He was so satisfied in that small victory, that he didn’t notice me come up from behind until I was smashing his head in with my sword. Made sure he was dead; didn’t stop hitting until I saw brains.

Then I ran up to the second floor, which Velma and Scooby were searching. I assumed Javert had gone on ahead further up. The two on that floor saw me as I was running to the stairs, and Velma almost shot me in the face. I’ve got a little cut across my left ear where the bullet grazed by. They chased after me, following me up the stairs. When I reached the landing on the third floor, I stopped. Velma was halfway up the stairs, while Scooby was lagging behind. The stairs were narrow; only enough room for one person to go up at a time. Less dodging space for them. On the third floor landing, I had placed a barrel of cement (that thing was bloody hard to drag up three stories, I’ll have you know), which I rolled down the stairs towards Velma. Yeah, “Oho, how amusingly cartoonic, rolling a barrel down the stairs to attack someone!” You know what happens when a heavy barrel hits you in the ribs, knocks you down two flights of concrete stairs, and then crushes your head between it and the concrete wall on the first floor? The mess which Velma left was worse than Shaggy’s.

Tragically, Scooby proved to be surprisingly dexterous, and was able to move out of the way of the rolling barrel of doom. Once that threat had passed, he came charging up those stairs. He proceeded to frantically search the third floor, trying to find me. His attention was caught by movement he saw near an open window. Scooby quickly ran over to investigate, but found it to just be coat which had been nailed to the window frame, flapping in the breeze. Before he could turn from the jacket, I was behind him. I grabbed his right arm with both hands, and broke it at the elbow, making him drop his gun. Then I threw him out the window. Falling from three stories down into hard, unforgiving rubble…. Scooby could be called lucky, as it didn’t appear to kill him instantly. Still, based on his screams of pain, I doubt he’d have lived much longer. I grabbed the gun he’d dropped, and ran up the stairs.

Which just left Javert. The warm up was over, and the real show was about to begin.

The fourth floor was when the shoddy nature of the building’s construction began to really show; holes in the floors/walls, exposed piping, tools left lying around…. They hadn’t even finished making the stairs to the fifth floor, where Setoth was. You needed to use a ladder to reach it. When I reached the fourth floor, I came up just in time to see Javert climbing the ladder. I began to run after him, when I heard an inhuman shriek echo through the building. Then Porfiry appeared, out of nowhere, in the middle of the fourth floor.

He looked much the same as last time. Eyes gouged out, face burned, arm twisted, ribcage torn open to reveal the organs underneath…. I got only a few seconds to experience surprise before he charged at me. Like any sane person, I started shooting at him with the gun I’d taken from Scooby. Most of my shots went wild; I did manage to land two bullets in his chest, and hit him in the face when I threw the gun at him after running out of ammo. None of it seemed to bother him. He reached to strangle me, but I grabbed his arm and threw him onto his back. Pulled out my sword and swung it down at him, but he rolled aside and leapt back up. Charged at me again; I tried to knock him aside with my sword, but he ignored the blow and scratched at my face. The nails dug pretty deep, going straight across, barely missing my eyes. The second time he tried to claw at me, I bit the hand he was using. God, zombie Porfiry tastes awful. Succeeded in biting off three of his fingers, and then hit him in the eye with the hilt of my sword to force him to back off. Let’s see you claw out my eyes when you don’t have any fingers left on your hands….

As he always does, Porfiry launched another charge, tackling me into a concrete pillar. That left me dazed for a few seconds, during which time he bit into my right shoulder. Hurt like hell. I had to pull his face off of me, and then slammed it into the pillar repeatedly. Completely destroyed his nose, and part of his cheek bones, before he elbowed me in the gut hard enough to make me let go. Which was followed immediately afterward by him grabbing my throat with one hand, and squeezing. I tried breaking his arm, but even after I heard the bone snap, he kept squeezing. My vision started to go dark, as I couldn’t bring any oxygen into my lungs. I grabbed two of the exposed ribs poking out his side, and pulled on them. Kept pulling until I heard them snap; his grip loosened involuntarily then, just slightly, but enough for me to break free.

If I lived in a perfect world, I’d have been given the opportunity to catch my breath and massage the bruises I’d just gotten along my throat. However, I don’t live in a perfect world. Porfiry tried to pounce on me to resume the strangling; I kicked him in the chest and threw him over me, right through a hole in the flooring. When I looked down it to see what happened to Porfiry, he was lying on the ground, both legs broken, trying to pull himself along the floor. His face turned up towards me…. I don’t know how he can see with his eyes gouged out, but somehow he was looking at me…. And he screamed that high pitched, impossible shriek. I grabbed a large piece of masonry that was on the floor and pelted it at his head; it cracked the skull open. I don’t even know if that killed him; his body was still twitching on the floor, even as the brains leaked out of his skull. But at least it meant he wasn’t fighting.

And so, bleeding, exhausted, and in pain, I climbed up the ladder to confront Javert.


The fifth floor was the top of the building, and the least finished in terms of construction. Setoth was sitting in the center, surrounded by his magickal whatevers. Standing next to him, looking at the sigils with apparent curiosity, was Javert. He didn’t face me when I came up, but in spite of my attempts to be sneaky, could tell I was there.

Javert: “I suppose it’s a failing on my part. Even when He tells me to do so, I find myself unable to kill a man who cannot defend himself. And yet I must prevent his plan from succeeding. I wonder what would happen if I just tried to scuff out these symbols around him?”

Arkady: “I dunno, maybe he’d explode or something?” I have no idea what would actually happen, but I’m under the impression that it would be very, very bad.

J: “A jest. Very typical of you.” He finally faced me. “You know, Arkady, while my mission here is to stop this man from stealing a member of His kingdom, you are the real reason I have come. I’ve been waiting for a chance to fight you for a long time. A real fight this time; no outside interferences, no witnesses to avoid, just a battle to the end.”

A: “Good. We’re thinking the same thing.”

J: He pulled out his gun, looked at it with amusement for a moment, and then threw it out a window. “Let’s make this fair then?”

I immediately came to the conclusion that fighting fair is for chumps, and charged at him with my sword. He caught the swing with one hand. God I wish this thing had a blade on it. With his free hand, he punched me in the gut. Hard.

J: “I’ve been thinking about your reference to Heart of Darkness which you made. When you wrote that, did you stop to consider that Kurtz did not wish to be rescued?”


The sword was pulled out of my hands and throw aside. Javert then kicked me in the chest, knocking me back several feet.

A: I had to pant for breath a bit. Javert was polite enough to let me do so. “Fine, how about Orpheus descending into the underworld to save Eurydice?” I ran forward and swung at him.

J: After catching my fist and kneeing me in the chest “Do you really have such little confidence in your comrades that you would compare them to a myth where the hero failed?”

A: “Shut up, it was the first thing that came to mind!” This time, I did succeed in hitting him, punching him in the face. Which would have been a greater accomplishment had he not immediately struck back, knocking me to the ground.

J: “You’re putting up much less of a fight than I expected. Did Porfiry really give you that much trouble? I’m starting to wonder if you even beat him, or if you only made it up here after running away in fear.”

A: “Poor Porfiry’s had an accident.” I grabbed Javert’s leg, and pulled, causing him to fall to the ground. “SO MAY YOU ALL.”

Now I had the initiative. Before he could stand back up, I brought my foot down onto his head.

A: “Javert, Javert! You make the world by whispers, second by second. Are you blind to that? Whether you make it a grave or garden of roses is not the point. Feel the floor: is it not hard” I brought my foot down on his head again. “Hard, yes! Observe the hardness, write it down in careful runes. Now, sing of floors! Sing!”

When I tried to hit him a third time, he rolled aside, quickly stood up, and punched me in the face twice. Got a bloody nose from that.

J: “I dreamt that the whole world was condemned to a terrible new strange plague that had come to Europe from the depths of Asia. All were to be destroyed except a very few chosen. Some new sorts of microbes were attacking the bodies of men, but these microbes were endowed with intelligence and will. Men attacked by them became at once mad and furious. But never had men considered themselves so intellectual and so completely in possession of the truth as these sufferers, never had they considered their decisions, their scientific conclusions, their moral convictions so infallible. Whole villages, whole towns and peoples went mad from the infection. All were excited and did not understand one another. Each thought that he alone had the truth and was wretched looking at the others, beat himself on the breast, wept, and wrung his hands. They did not know how to judge and could not agree what to consider evil and what good; they did not know whom to blame, whom to justify. Men killed each other in a sort of senseless spite. They gathered together in armies against one another, but even on the march the armies would begin attacking each other, the ranks would be broken and the soldiers would fall on each other, stabbing and cutting, biting and devouring each other. The alarm bell was ringing all day long in the towns; men rushed together, but why they were summoned and who was summoning them no one knew. The most ordinary trades were abandoned, because everyone proposed his own ideas, his own improvements, and they could not agree. The land too was abandoned. Men met in groups, agreed on something, swore to keep together, but at once began on something quite different from what they had proposed. They accused one another, fought and killed each other. There were conflagrations and famine. All men and all things were involved in destruction. The plague spread and moved further and further. Only a few men could be saved in the whole world. They were a pure chosen people, destined to found a new race and a new life, to renew and purify the earth, but no one had seen these men, no one had heard their words and their voices.”

A: “Don’t you quote Dosteyevsky at me!” I tried to tackle him, but he grabbed me, flipped me over his shoulder, and threw me at a wall.

J: “If you are a man, Arkady, you are the last man. Your kind is extinct; we are the inheritors. Do you understand that you are alone? You are outside history, you are non-existent. The command of the old despotisms was Thou Shalt Not. The command of the totalitarians was Thou Shalt. Our command is Thou Art. There shall only be loyalty to He that Is.”

A: I was still lying against the wall, trying to recover.
“Here at least
we shall be free; the Almighty hath not built
Here for his envy, will not drive us hence:
Here we may reign secure, and in my choice
to reign is worth ambition though in Hell:
Better to reign in Hell, than serve in Heaven.”

J: “Milton?” He kicked me in the chest as I tried to get up. “I thought you would be better than something that obvious. I wonder, what would you think if you could see the wickedness and sin which you live in?”

A: “I would much rather prefer to be Lord Henry than Lord Gray.”

J: He seemed surprised for a moment. A rare moment. I wish I had a camera so I could remember it. “I wasn’t aware that you had read ‘The Picture of Dorian Gray’. We didn’t find a copy of it when we searched your apartment.”

A: “Got it from the St. Edwards Library here. You think I’m going to let being a fugitive on the run from your boss cut into my reading time?”

J: He laughed, cheerfully, almost as a friend would. “Good man! But enough of this. You’ve lost. And while I am not allowed to kill you….”He kicked me in the face, leaving me dazed. Before I could react, Javert grabbed my left arm, twisted, and pulled. I could feel the joint popping out of the socket…. Yeah, I screamed in pain. There isn’t anyone who wouldn’t have. “…. You don’t need to be wholly intact. Besides, you’re right handed. You don’t need your left arm to serve Him.”

A: In between gasps of pain
“Blow, winds, and crack your cheeks! rage! blow!
You cataracts and hurricanoes, spout
Till you have drenched our steeples, drowned the cocks!
You sulphurous and thought-executing fires,
Vaunt-couriers to oak-cleaving thunderbolts,
Singe my white head! And thou, all-shaking thunder,
Strike flat the thick rotundity o' the world!
Crack nature's molds, all germens spill at once
That make ingrateful man!”

J: “Keep shouting your defiance. But now I must finish my task.”

He turned towards where Setoth should have been…. But there was no Setoth there. The circle of chalk was empty.

Suddenly, Setoth jumped out from the shadows, and hit Javert in the face with my sword. When Setoth tried for another swing, Javert grabbed Setoth’s wrist and twisted. Setoth screamed in pain, but that gave me a chance. Using my uninjured arm, I pulled myself up, and then charged him. I hit him in the back with my good shoulder; Javert turned around angrily to fight me, but in that time, Setoth struck him with the sword. The two of us began to attack Javert with everything we had in us. Javert struck back against us many times, punches, kicks, grapples, but we kept pressing him backwards. Whenever he gained the advantage over one of us, the other would leap forward and press Javert back.

Soon, he was at the edge of the building. There was a hole in the wall behind him, leaving nothing between Javert and a five story drop. Setoth and I were exhausted; both of us were badly beat up, and my dislocated shoulder was roaring in agony. We prepared for a final charge, to throw him over….

Javert looked back, into the dark drop. Then a small smile spread on his face. Javert took one step backwards, and fell down into the darkness. Setoth and I ran to the edge to see his fall, but the night hid it from us.

We left the building soon. Setoth said that something had forced him out of the Astral Plane, and he couldn’t get back in. Kal had been left on his own in there. I’m not sure how that’s going to turn out, him on his own in that place.
My arm’s been popped back into place, but it still hurts like hell. It might take a while to recover.
Now all we can do is wait to see if word comes back from Kal.

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fuck it’s hard to type with only one arm. fuuuuuuuuuck. still alive at least. i’ll post what happened later.

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At the construction site, on the top floor. Setoth’s doing his thing. I’ve set up a few surprises around the place, and Setoth drew those protective sigil things around it as well.
Two cars just pulled up, four people got out. One of them was Javert. This is going to be fun.

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A PLAN

Do we have a crazy party planned for you all tonight.

You see, Setoth has come up with a PLAN. A plan of a most glorious nature.

You remember that Kal guy? It seems I misjudged him. All signs pointed towards him giving in and becoming another pathetic victim, but then, at the sight of a child being taken by Slender Man, he gained a resolve I have seen in few others. And this has been no ordinary, mass produced resolve. He is not content to simply defy Slender Man through evasion and survival. No; this paragon of determination’s very first reaction was to contact Setoth and ask for a way to go after Slendy and get victims back. No thought, no hesitation, just a pure, glorious offensive, aimed to strike at the heart of the enemy.

As the occult is not an area I have much expertise in (if I had known that the supernatural would play such a large role in my life, I’d have dropped out of school and joined a cult), most of Setoth’s explanations were incomprehensible to me. Something about the Astral Plane, only not the Astral Plane, because they’d already checked there and didn’t find anything….

Yeah, when I heard Setoth say he and Kal had checked the Astral Plane, in the same tone he’d use to say he’d walked to his living room, I did a double take. I guess something like that isn’t much of a big deal to a genuine practicing occultist? Or perhaps Setoth just drank a wee bit too much of his absinthe and the entire conversation I just had with him was me listening to a drunken rant? If so, damn Setoth, you are a crazy drunk.

Anyways, what Kal wants to do is go into this Not-Astral Plane place, and wreck Slendy’s shit. Since Kal’s experience with magick is only slightly better than mine (although to be honest, there are probably rocks out there which know more about magick, Crowley, and the occult than I do), Setoth is going to be doing most of the work for this. Apparently Setoth being in Texas and Kal being in Colorado doesn’t matter for this ritual thing Setoth has planned. He said it was because of something about orbits, or maybe it was aeons, or….. ARGH, THIS STUFF MAKES QUANTUM STRING THEORY LOOK SANE.

The part where I come in has thankfully little to do with this abracadabra stuff. While Setoth’s tromping around in the Not-Astral Plane place, his body in boring old regular world is going to be a vegetable. During that time, he’ll be vulnerable. It’s very unlikely that Slendy would just sit back and let Setoth do whatever he pleases, and with Javert in the city, things might get a bit dangerous. Therefore it’s my job to make sure nothing violent happens to Setoth while he’s handling stuff.

I have to say, I’m getting really excited about this. We’ve already picked the locale: a partially finished construction site, five stories tall, with plenty of hazards and dangers which I may use to entertain any guests who show. And I really do hope that we get guests tonight.

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Saturday, March 26, 2011

Analysis

As part of Setoth’s research, he’s asked me to review all the weirdness that’s gone on with us. Because being the only one who actually reads a large amount of other blogs makes me the expert, apparently.

This also means I had to actually read that blog Setoth’s friend has.
Yeah, Setoth has friends apart from me.
I felt so betrayed when I realized it, man. Like my heart had been torn from my body. I think I’m going to need a moment to myself.
….
Okay, all better now.

So I guess let’s get to analyzing these things.

-I was the first of us to encounter Slender Man. Now that I think about, I never really talked much about how I met him. When I first started writing, I was trying to be “Ooh, I’m so dark and mysterious!”, and now, I really don’t’ care much about it anymore. But I suppose I should tell, for the sake of science. Standard delving in too deep, Tulpa based encounter. I’d read several dozen blogs, watched most of the video series, even had an operator symbol sewn into a jacket (I don’t have that jacket anymore; it was thrown out shortly after I first saw Slendy). At first, I thought my visions of Slendy were just a result of an overactive imagination. It soon became apparent that it wasn’t. Fun times soon followed.

-My original roommate, Jason, was the next infected. Not entirely sure why; he’d never heard of Slender Man before. And it wasn’t as though he was someone close to me; we just happened to be roommates. He might just have been caught up as collateral damage.

-Then I tossed Jason to the Slender Man. Setoth, you might want to review that post a few times; while I may not have been at my sanest when I wrote it, it’s the only first hand record of Slender Man killing someone that any of us have. Even if it is an incomplete record. The laughter I heard would later be repeated, which might be something else to look into.

-Went to Austin, where I started to really badly break down. It took around 32 days since Slender Man’s first appearance before I decided to give myself up to him. Most of the psychological degradation came after I killed Jason. The records I have of that time are in very sorry state, and I can barely remember the exact details of what was going on then. Which is a disappointment, as it was the best example of Slender Man screwing with reality we’ve seen so far.

-Then I snapped out of whatever I’d been in (or perhaps just snapped, if you want to look at it from that perspective), started putting the ideology I’d been preaching into practice, and became awesome. Burning down a forest along the way. Setoth: You might want to look into the part of that post when I first went into the forest, before I started running out. Something about that place wasn’t right. I’m pretty familiar with Central Texas countryside, and there’s nothing like that forest anywhere around here. Bit of a shame that it was so dark and foggy, or I could have gone into more detail describing it.

-Returned to my university apartment, and met Javert for the first time. The first proxy I’d encountered. I’m unsure why there was the sudden shift from Slender Man on his own to using proxies; perhaps as a response to my shift in mentality towards him? But that’s assuming he’s responsive to our attitudes….

-Second proxy encounetr. This one wouldn’t die no matter how much harm I inflicted on him. Whatever Slendy did to him, I had to stab him into a bloody pulp and then run over him with my car before he stopped trying to kill me.

-Lots of stuff with me dealing with Javert and his buddies, plus Slendy screwing with my head. Nothing which would be much interest to Setoth’s research. I did meet Porfiry during this time, although I in no way suspected what he would later become.

-Then we finally have these other people showing up. Way up north, long past the borders where civilization ends and the parts of the US which aren’t Texas begin, in the state of Colorado, Kal had been living with his roommate Henry, doing whatever it is normal college students do when they aren’t being stalked. The two were sharing a blog, which they used to complain about insomnia and sickness. At first I thought those were a result of Slender Man, but then came to the conclusion that they were just whiny crybabies. Kal had been working as a student teacher or something for an elementary school. But then, surprises of surprises, one of his students disappeared. GEE I WONDER WHO COULD HAVE DONE THAT.

-Back to people who matter, I had been trapped in my apartment by Javert and his people. My first attempt to escape failed miserably. The second was a glorious success. I encountered another proxy directly under Slendy’s control (compared to the ones working for Javert) during the second attempt, but he died like a regular person, instead of being nigh impossible to kill for good. Still unsure of why there was such a difference. Also interesting to note that by that point, Slender Man was almost exclusively using Javert and his proxies against me. He would intervene, but it was an intervention after I had done something to his proxies, not a direct assault against me. Might want to look more into the reason for the change in behavior.

-In Colorado Land, Kal got to see his very first Slender Man. This is another time I’m not sure why Slender Man chose to stalk someone. From what Setoth has told me about Kal, he had never heard of Slender Man before this. The only connection was through the student who was taken by Slender Man. After reading the blog, Kal seems to have taken on a lot of guilt about the girl. Perhaps his obsession with her disappearance was the reason? Or maybe Slendy just wanted to screw with someone? Not sure if I can tell. Ooh, and during this whole time where Kal’s panicking about being stalked by Slendy, Henry just continues the blog as usual. Talking about a new girlfriend, writing little short stories; when juxtaposed with Kal’s panic, it’s hilarious.

-Back to me, I had made it to Austin. After a few days there, I saw Porfiry again, although by that time he was under Slendy’s total control. Then I had a very….. Fun…. Encounter with Porfiry and Slendy, which left me temporarily crippled. I believe that’s the first time Slender Man has ever physically hit me. It also raises the question of why I didn’t drown while I was unconscious in the river; looking at it realistically, I shouldn’t have been alive long enough for someone to see me drifting and call the paramedics. Actually…. How the hell did they see me? I was wearing black, it was the middle of the night, and there aren’t many lights along Town Lake. Damn. Why didn’t I think of that before…. After I’m done writing this, I might need to swing by Town Lake at night and do some tests to see if it was really possible for someone to see me that night.

-Apparently Kal had been reading up on Slender Man, because he went to Setoth asking about an article on Encyclopedia Slenderia. Setoth responded. In extreme detail. Setoth found this whole “Slenderman” thing amusing enough that he decided to prove it wrong by summoning Slendy through Thelemic rituals. This turned out to be a terrible mistake, and I still make fun of him for it whenever I can find the chance. For once, it’s glaringly obvious why Slender Man decided to stalk this guy: Slendy really, really doesn’t like it when you try to screw around and prove he doesn’t exist by summoning him through magickal rituals. So in case any of you were thinking of doing that, stop and consider how valuable you believe your kidney is.

-After I found Setoth’s blog, we agreed to meet up. The rest (failing to capture Porfiry as a test subject, and all the events of Javert return/Porfiry’s resurrection) has happened recently enough that I’m assuming Setoth won’t need my help looking over. Unless he’s developed short term memory loss. You think you’ve developed short term memory loss, Setoth?

-And for a final note, Kal from Colorado appears to be nearing the breaking point. I’d give him a week, maybe two, left. His roommate Henry remains hilariously unaware of what’s going on, and seems to be assuming that Kal has gone insane or something similar.


Hopefully that should be enough info to give us some direction in analyzing things. I doubt we’ll find any answers, but any kind of pattern, to at least give us an idea for why these things happen like they do (why Slender Man went from stalking to violent against me, why he was aggressively violent towards Setoth from the start, and why Kal’s still stuck at the stalking stage, for example) would be nice.

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Thursday, March 24, 2011

Javert's Return

Crazy night. It’d be best if I skipped the introductory small talk and moved straight into content.

Over a week of quiet nights had passed; peaceful, but boring. I was at Setoth’s place, as usual. Around 3 in the morning, I heard musical notes coming from outside. After several seconds of listening, I identified it as Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata. However, after looking out the windows, I found the area around the apartment lacking in late night musicians. A theory began to grow in my head. I asked Setoth if he could hear the music; after hurling various obscenities at me for waking him up, he confirmed that he couldn’t hear anything.

Once more, the safe course of action (ignoring the mysterious music and staying at home) was the opposite of what I did. Upon grabbing my sword and exiting the building, I could discern the direction from where the song originated. I followed it for some time; no matter how far I walked, the music always seemed to be coming from someplace nearby. After almost a mile wandering the night streets of downtown Austin, I reached the final destination. It was a bar along 6th street, but unlike the others, there were no lights or crowds of drunken students outside. Only darkness and music came from the gray walled structure. Aiming to create for myself a dramatic entrance, I strode to the door and kicked it as hard as I could.

I won’t bore you with the full details of what happened as a consequence, except to say it involve me swearing loudly and clutching my throbbing foot. After that pain died down, I got back up and pulled the door open.

Indoors was fancier than I’d expected. Fine furniture, expensive wines, and a style which called for suits and money filled the place. At the back was a stage, and upon that stage, illuminated by a spotlight, Javert was playing the piano. He was dressed in a black police uniform; rather classy looking. Soon after I entered, the song came to an end, and he looked towards me.

Javert: “It’s been a while, hasn’t it, Arkady.” He said. “I had begun to worry that someone else would take my place in pursuing you. You don’t mind if I call you by that name you’ve given yourself online? I believe it to suit you much better than the one you were given at birth.”

I didn’t answer then, instead focusing on my surroundings. Javert still had his gun, and there was no nearby cover which could stop a bullet. And the distance between us was too much for me to rush him.

J: “You’re amazingly quiet.” He continued, grinning that wide grin of his. “The last time we spoke, I had to hit you to make you stop talking.”

Arkady: “I was just surprised to see you, that’s all.” Keep him talking, I thought. You might find an opening. “This city’s out of your jurisdiction, after all.”

J: “I’m not here on police business. You still haven’t been charged with any of the crimes you’ve committed.”

A: “Then what’s with the uniform?” The very fancy uniform. Where’d he get something like that? I don’t remember them being standard issue down at the PD.

J: “It serves as a reminder of my purpose, and a symbol of the justice which I serve.”

A: “Ya know, crazy as it sounds, helping the faceless abomination kill people doesn’t strike me as something which I would call ‘justice’. It just doesn’t seem to fit.”

Prepare for a long winded rant from him now.
J: “Really, now? Is it wrong to call it justice when I pursue someone like you? You call Him a monster and an abomination, but what of yourself?” His voice turned bitter. “You’ve killed four innocent people, one of whom was a fellow officer of mine, assaulted two others, stolen a car and several wallets, and burned down an entire forest, along with several homes bordering it. Homes with people inside. Yet you show no regret for any of your actions; rather, you take pride in them, and publically boast of your exploits. You have no morals or code which you live by. You are the monster in this world. After observing you all this time, the only conclusion I can draw to form any reason behind your actions is that you are trying to outdo the character whose name you took in sheer depravity and evil. All you need to do to match him now is attempted rape and pedophilia; I don’t want to know how you plan to then surpass him.” There was no reason for him to be throwing around accusations of pedophilia around. Sure, I attempted to bribe Cynthia with offers of ice cream over on her blog, but you have to look at it in the context of the thing! “I can scarcely imagine what atrocities you would commit if you had not fixated your attention on Him. Thus far I have only managed to save one person from you; the man you stole your car from. Had I not gotten him to a hospital as soon as I’d found him, the concussion you gave him would have killed him. But it’s impossible for me to rescue all of your victims. I would be saving lives if I were to shoot you right now.”

A: “So why don’t you, hm?”

J: “Because, mad as it may sound, our God is merciful, and he has chosen to put you on the path to redemption.”

A: I paused for several seconds, unsure of what to say. “I’m sorry? Redemption?”

J: He smiled, so very smugly. Like I was a dolt asking the teacher a stupid question. “Of course. Did you think the reason you’re still alive is because of your own actions? Don’t be foolish. You said yourself, He can ‘appear behind you, wrap a tentacle around your neck, and pop off your head’ without any warning.” Well, now I know he reads my blog. “The only reason He has not done so is because He chooses not to kill you.”

A: “And? I’d always thought that was because he just liked playing with his food first.”

J: “Don’t be so crude; the reason is much more sophisticated.” So he likes to play with his food in a sophisticated manner? “Forgiving those who seem unforgivable is a tale found repeatedly in the Bible. Think of the city of Nineveh, and how it was saved from destruction when its people chose to repent.” If I remember that story correctly, there was also a guy named Jonah who got pissed off at god when the city was forgiven instead of destroyed. I KNOW YOU’RE READING THIS BLOG, JAVERT. MAYBE YOU SHOULD DO SOME SOUL SEARCHING ABOUT YOUR CAPACITY FOR FORGIVENESS RIGHT ABOUT NOW?

A: “So what, I’m a city? Why don’t I have aqueducts running all around me?” For a moment I considered throwing something at him, but I had nothing heavy enough to actually hurt him with.

J: “The city is a metaphor.” He seemed very annoyed then. Which shows that my response was a success. “It was given a choice between salvation and destruction. As are all who are judged by God.”

A: I’d been using this time to slowly inch forward. By that point, I had covered a third of the original distance between us. “Look, Javert, you’re a nice guy and all, but I’d appreciate it if you’d keep pseudo-religious overtones out of the Lovecraftian horror story I’m going through right now. Everyone knows that the Cthulhu Mythos’s best works were back before Lovecraft’s successors turned it all Judeo-Christian after all.”

J: “If you wish to ignore me, I won’t stop you. Damnation is a choice you make on your own.” Ooh, look at me, I’m Javert, and I’m all high and mighty with my moral superiority.

A: “Yeah, well, excuse me for not making the connection between the supposedly loving, compassionate god you claim to be serving and the thing in the suit which eviscerates children. How the hell is killing people en masse supposed to be merciful?”

J: “Death is only a tragedy from a human perspective, not a divine one.”

A: “The hell are you trying to say with that?”

J: “Did you ever read the Screwtape Letters?” Did he actually think he could outdo me in literary references?

A: “Yeah. Felt the ending was too depressing. I would have been happier if Screwtape's nephwew had broken the man and eaten his soul.”

J: “You have an awful tendency to misinterpret the meaning of books you read.”

A: “Yeah, well, it’s a bad HABIT.” Javert seemed unimpressed by my attempt at referential humor.

J: “The ending of the book is supposed to be a triumph, as the human dies while he is within grace, and thus enters heaven. Compare this to the children you shout about in a doomed attempt to give yourself the moral high ground; He takes them into His kingdom while they are still free of sin.”

A: “What about all those people he’s disemboweled?”

J: “Is it not natural for God to smite those who have fallen too far from grace? The cities of Sodom and Gomorra were destroyed for their wickedness.”

A: “Creating fear and paranoia.”

J: “Fear is a rational response to seeing something so terribly powerful. Think of the angels who appeared to the shepherds; they first had to reassure those humans by telling them not to be afraid.”

A: “Brainwashed proxies.”

J: “Disciples who have given themselves up in the service of Him.”

A: “You’ve put a lot of thought into this, haven’t you.”

J: “Of course. At the least, it cannot be said that I follow an incomplete theology.”

A: By that point, I was halfway across the room, and considering throwing a chair at him. “I dunno, I think I can see a pretty large hole in it. Mostly in the part where you claim that Yahweh is a friggin’ tall man-tree hybrid thing in a business suit without a face. That just doesn’t seem to say divinity to me.”

J: “He may take any form he wishes. And after seeing everything he has done, how can you deny his omnipotence? He has existed for thousands of years. He knows all that has happened, and all that will happen. Time and space are toys to Him. When faced with such a being, worship is the only correct response.”

A: “Bullshit. The only correct response is to fight against it as hard as you can. Anything less is weakness. If you see something stronger than you, you struggle against that thing, until you surpass them. You keep fighting and struggling until you have reached the top, and seized divinity for yourself. That is the only way a human should live.”

J: “You are a fool. A petulant child rebelling against their father simply out of spite. Your ‘way humans should live’ is a chaotic bloodbath fit only for sociopaths such as yourself.”

A: “And you’re a slave. I’d rather live in my bloodbath than in your peaceful, ordered world, if it meant I could be free.”

J: “Again, you prove that you are a fool. He does not seek slaves. Something as powerful as He has no use for them. What He wants are disciples, people who can be taught. His aim is not to have us toil under him eternally, but for us to be raised to his level, and become one with him once we enter his kingdom.”

A: “Referencing Screwtape again? There are authors outside of Lewis, you know.”

J: “I could say the same to you about Dosteyevksy.”Oh no he did not just say that.

A: Three fourths across the room. There was no way he wasn’t noticing I was getting closer, but he allowed me to do so anyway. “So what’s the reason for all of this? I don’t think you’d draw me all the way out here just to have a little chat. And if this is a trap, it’s an annoyingly extended one.”

J: “It is a trap. But not for you. You aren’t the only one in this city to have drawn His attention.”

A: Then realization hit me. “You wanted to get me away from Setoth.”

J: He nodded. “A more indirect plan than I’d have liked, but it is what we have been compelled to do. Shortly after we began to talk, the one you have chosen to call ‘Porfiry’ began to attack your friend.”

A: “Bullshit. Porfiry’s dead. I saw the fire burn that place down.”

J: “Arkady, have you ever heard of the tale of Lazarus?”

A very long silence descended. I’m a bit ashamed of my reaction here, to be honest, but will write it down for accuracy’s sake….

A: “Fuck. No fucking way. You can’t fucking do that! I killed him! He’s dead! You can’t fucking bring back people I fucking already killed! That’s…. That’s…. You can’t fucking do that! He can’t be alive! That’s not fucking possible!”

J: “Who are you to tell a god what is impossible?” Damn it, he looked so annoyingly triumphant then….



That felt like a good stopping point for the conversation. I pulled out my sword and tried to rush him, hoping that I could cover the distance between us before he pulled his gun out.

He didn’t even try to stop me. Just sat behind that piano, smiling. I was less than a foot away from him, about to swing at his face, when everything around me seemed to blur and twist. For several seconds, colors and shapes whirled around me, making me feel sick. Then, I blacked out.

When I woke up, I was outside Setoth’s apartment.

The front door was open, and no sign of Setoth inside. Still, I figured it wouldn’t be that hard to find him; all I would have to do would be to follow the trail of unnaturally thick fog which had settled over downtown. But first I grabbed some rags, a lighter, and a bottle of absinthe. Just in case.

After I ran into the fog, geography got…. Strange. I could barely see a few feet ahead of me, so I tried using whatever landmarks I came across to keep me grounded in my location, but I soon began to realize that the landmarks were out of order. I’d run past something from west Austin, and then a few seconds later pass a feature from east Austin. While running north. I soon gave up trying to keep track of where I was, and just followed the fog.

I was led to a large, stone church. It was a place I’d driven by several times when I was younger; the design is similar to the old Protestant churches in Germany. The lights were on inside, which let me peer through one of the stained glass windows and watch the spectacle. Setoth, Porfiry, and Slendy were there, in the aisle running down the rows of pews. Setoth looked like he was in some kind of trance, his feet slowly moving across the red carpet towards Slender Man’s growing embrace. As for Porfiry…. At least, I think it was Porfiry. Whatever it was, it wasn’t human anymore. His eyes were gone, as though they had been gouged out, and scars covered his face, making it nearly unrecognizable. His arm was twisted gruesomely, and his ribs had been pulled apart, tearing the flesh and revealing the pulsating organs underneath. He looked more like some kind of undead creature than a man given a miraculous second life.

Ignoring the vast amounts of time and money which had likely been put into the creation of such an artistic window, I smashed through it with my sword, and leaped through the hole. As soon as I landed inside the church, I lit the Molotov I’d made out of the absinthe, and threw it at Slender Man. The flames exploded around him; Porfiry screamed and suddenly vanished. Slender Man turned to face me. There was no sign that I’d harmed him at all, but it broke Setoth out of whatever hypnosis stuff he was in, and he stopped walking towards it. Still, with the initial shock he seemed to be going through when he came to, Setoth wasn’t reacting fast enough for my tastes, so I grabbed him by the arm and pulled him towards the door. After the first few steps, he began to run on his own, and we dashed towards our chance at escape.

I looked back once, and when I did, I had the realization that maybe throwing fire at the pyrokinetic creature wasn’t the best plan. The flames were spreading out from him, covering the church. The statues of Jesus and the disciples, the altar, the cross…. Everything was covered in fire. In the very center of it all, Slender Man stood, his tentacles reaching upwards; like a black tree of fire growing from the stone floor.

The two of us made it to the door, and then blacked out. We both woke up several hours later back at Setoth’s apartment. I checked the news about any churches burning down, but came up with nothing.
But I did see a familiar patrol car drive by. It slowed down as it passed, as though to say hello to us, and then drove out of sight.

And here's Setoth's view on these things. Next time, try to avoid getting chased by zombie proxies when I'm not around, Setoth.

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